The balance of it all.

When I had my first son, I swore that that was it and I would never have any more children. Well, needless to say, seven years down the road I met and fell in love with my fiancé. After a while of being together we decided to have a baby. Now, through all the excitement and joy of trying and trying and then finding out we're pregnant and then planning for the new baby, part of me still worried about what it was going to be like to have another child. I worried that my fiancé would feel differently towards my son since he's not his biological father and soon he would have a child of his own. I worried that my son would feel left out, excluded for everything, jealous, or even a little remorseful towards us. I worried about how my oldest would act seeing as how he was the only child and the complete center of our whole world for so long.
I know that someone cannot help the way that they feel. I know that there is a bond between a biological father and son that is completely different than that of a stepdad and son, and these are things I worried about everyday. During my whole pregnancy, we made sure to do lots of things with Diego, family trips, movie nights, plenty of play and quality time. We made sure we drilled it into his head that when Collin comes, we won't love him any less, but because Collin is a baby, he was going to need a lot of our attention and it could no longer be all about just Diego. He told us that he understands this and that he was excited to have a brother...I was happy to hear this...but part of me still worried about him and how he would really feel when the time came.
Well finally the day came when Collin arrived. Diego visited with his grandpa and my fiancé every night. He held his new brother in the hospital and was very excited. All he talked about everywhere he went was his new brother Collin. He surpassed my expectations with flying colors. He was the proudest big brother I have ever seen. Even still, now Collin is a month old, and he is still Diego's pride and joy. He wants to hold him constantly, he wants to feed him, and when Collin fusses, Diego is right there to distract him and make him stop crying. I have been lucky enough to be blessed with two amazing boys that I wouldn't trade for the world. <3

A whole new world....kind of...

So I took a break from the whole blogging world for a while to concentrate on the new family addition and making it all work, and now that everyone is adjusted and doing well with it, immmmm back :). So the day for baby to be here finally came, after ten loooong months of pregnancy! Collin Joseph Geraway, was born on December 10, 2012 at 2:33pm weighing 7lbs 7oz and 19 inches long. He had the expected ten fingers, ten toes, and came out absolutely perfect. I spent three looooong days in the hospital before I got to go home and enjoy my family.
Once we got home, I had forgotten how different it is to have a baby...I was so used to a seven year old that was self sufficient, could tell me what he wanted or what was wrong with him, and who slept through the night. Now, here I am, recovering from delivery, taking care of a baby, and managing my seven year old, all while doing my wifely duties of cooking and maintaining the household. Wow. What a change. Luckily, my oldest son is very efficient and amazingly helpful when it comes to his little brother. He's always willing to hold or feed him...although its not any easier because I still have to sit with him and watch him, but it's endearing that he at least wants to try. I am very lucky that I have a grateful son who is excited to have a brother, rather than jealous or bitter.
So needless to say, after a few sleepless nights, some arguments with the husband, and lots and lots of tears, things straightened out, we became a well working team rather quickly, and routine set into our daily lives faster than expected. Today Collin is a month old, and although things aren't perfect, we are grateful to have two amazing children. Now that bathtimes are done, kids are fed and tucked into bed, the laundry is in the dryer, dishes are done and the alarm clock is set, it's time for this young, but rather old feeling mom, to go to bed! Ohhhh motherhood.